In her ground-breaking book, Ellie Osborne shares previously unknown secrets for raising happy and well-adjusted houseplants, ready to thrive at a moment’s notice. You’ll learn how to move beyond the destructive thinking of the past and forge a new bond with your plants. A revolution of the heart!
Through listening and observation, Ellie has developed insights that will lead to joy-filled houseplant relationships built on forgiveness, generosity and unconditional love.
“It all starts with knowledge,” said Ellie, “so don’t give up. As in other pursuits, easy victories, like one-night stands, are hollow. Of course, not always.”
Useful Tips From the Book:
Choose the right plant: Pleasant Shape. Nice Personality. Absence of pests or disease. In other words, the same things you would look for in a singles bar.
Don't try to bury sex in the dirt. Accept that your plants enjoy sex just like you do. We know this because there are lots and lots of plants. Also, experience tells us that Regular plants are not as fond of sex as are Weeds.
Be aware, some plants feel guilty about sex. One of these is the Century Plant, which requires a high ceiling. It waits 15 years (which seems like a Century) to mate. Then, it dies. Guilt Kills! Or, after waiting so long, maybe it dies of disappointment. (I can relate.)
Stop feeding plants on demand, which is over-indulgent. Set up a schedule and make your plant stick to it.
Through listening and observation, Ellie has developed insights that will lead to joy-filled houseplant relationships built on forgiveness, generosity and unconditional love.
“It all starts with knowledge,” said Ellie, “so don’t give up. As in other pursuits, easy victories, like one-night stands, are hollow. Of course, not always.”
Useful Tips From the Book:
Choose the right plant: Pleasant Shape. Nice Personality. Absence of pests or disease. In other words, the same things you would look for in a singles bar.
Don't try to bury sex in the dirt. Accept that your plants enjoy sex just like you do. We know this because there are lots and lots of plants. Also, experience tells us that Regular plants are not as fond of sex as are Weeds.
Be aware, some plants feel guilty about sex. One of these is the Century Plant, which requires a high ceiling. It waits 15 years (which seems like a Century) to mate. Then, it dies. Guilt Kills! Or, after waiting so long, maybe it dies of disappointment. (I can relate.)
Stop feeding plants on demand, which is over-indulgent. Set up a schedule and make your plant stick to it.
